I am a chronic sorry-er. I don’t know why I say it, but “I’m sorry” is an impulsive response for so many things in my life. I don’t even mean to say it, but it come out of my mouth without thinking. It’s a work in progress.
I realize that saying I’m sorry so often not only makes me seem weak, but also makes the words mean less. I think it stems from being a perfectionist and never wanting to inconvenience anyone. Maybe it’s from always feeling like I was doing something wrong or at fault for something when I was a kid. I don’t know, I’m not a psychologist. What I o know, however, is that over the years it has become a pattern ingrained in my daily conversations.
I need to stop being so sorry. Stop being sorry for doing my job. Stop being sorry for having a question. Stop being sorry for all of the mundane things that don’t need an apology.
I need to build other phrases in my vocabulary that can be used in place. Maybe I could say “excuse me” or just get right to the point. I talked before about “fake it until you make it” and I think confidence is another great example. If I’m not feeling super confident in myself, maybe I can just fake it until I believe it myself. Belief in having confidence and having confidence itself aren’t that much different in the end.
Can you think of someone in your life who is a chronic “sorry-er”?
If that person is you, maybe it’s time to stop the habit and start a new conversation.
You are strong and you are confident.